Today is... gulp... my oldest kiddos' birthday. He is six today. I've questioned this a few times. Maybe I lost track? Maybe I'm counting wrong? Was he REALLY born in 2005?


Six years ago my life changed OFFICIALLY. I mean, the day I found out I was pregnant was CERTAINLY the biggest birthday surprise EVER! No surprise party will top that. However, the day he was born I became a new person. I became mommy.


I have said this before, but I HATE the word mother. I feel like to be one of those I'd need jeans up to my boobs & a visor. I know. It is so stereotypical. I also cried the day we bought our minivan... Not tears of joy. But for me, "MOMMY" means so much more. It is the reason my life is so incredible.


I remember laying in the hospital, as labor was induced. I had no clue what was about to happen. I was thinking at some point it might hurt, I'd ask for some drugs & then I'd have a baby. And I'd like to remind you that I didn't like babies... until that moment. I had dilated & gone through labor faster than anticipated. There wasn't time for the usual progression, but they gave me "the stuff" & before I knew what was going on, there was this cry. It was precious. Not nearly as annoying as those other babies. As the nurses laid him on my chest, I fell in love. I loved my husband (well, he was my fiance at the time), but this was different. This little man heard his daddy's voice & instantly stopped crying. It was literally love at first sight. Our family had begun.


The past six years we have been through more than most couples do in their "honeymoon phase". Haha! Our honeymoon will happen later... after the kids move out. I mean, that is the bonus of having kids young, right? It wasn't my plan, but it was the greatest idea God could've had.


I'm on my way to the next year of loving this little guy & learning all about this child that is growing before my eyes. He is smart, kind, funny. He is the greatest big brother. He loves Jesus with all his heart & wants to do what is right. I couldn't be more proud of the young man he is becoming. Today I celebrate 6 years of that laugh; 6 years of his smile; 6 years of discovering each day through this example of how much my Heavenly Father really loves me.
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I haven't posted in a while... possibly because of the circus that is my life! I'm not saying that it's terrible. A circus is LOTS of fun, but sometimes the bearded lady & the guy who swallows fire are just a little over the top. Know what I mean? Every once in a while, I would kind of like to calm the freak show & have a normal day. Haha... oh wait... this IS normal! :)


I have had an eventful few months. I thought turning 25 was going to be more than I could handle. Little did I know that the week before this "milestone" I would get pregnant (again), that the night after my birthday my parents' house would catch on fire, that my little dog would no longer be a part of our life, or that I would be taken on this CRAZY journey over the next 6 months. SURPRISE! God likes to keep me on my toes, that's for sure.


My resolutions went out the door. Along with them went my ideas, plans & desires for what I thought would be a settling down for our family this year. Oh well. Here we are! My parents are now living with US, rather than the opposite for those 2 1/2 years. We just found out that baby #5 is indeed coming in December... and he is a boy. I have found myself trying to organize every inch of our house because "maybe if I organize it, things will calm down".


Here is what I have learned. I have 4 (soon to be 5) CHILDREN, not 4 organizational problems. I cannot sort & stash my CHILDREN. I can train them. I can teach them. I can guide them. The behavior issues are solving themselves as I have learned to lead their HEARTS more every day. Their actions are reflecting what my husband & I are praying.


I CAN, however organize my own priorities. What's most important? Making hairbows to make $5 a piece on... or making a necklace out of cheerios with my toddlers? Working in an office for 5 hours a week (which always turns to more)... or actually getting the dishes done so that the time I spend with my kids is truly spent WITH them. My house isn't fabulous & perfect. I'll admit it! I don't live in a Pottery Barn catalog (sigh!). But I am so much more satisfied with the fact that there are construction paper crafts covering my fridge. There are tiny handprints on my back window. There is a special signature in permanent ink on the closet door. AND, above all else, there is more love & laughter than we know what to do with.