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Today I am writing from the laundry room. It is also the pantry. It is also the room where all the crap hangs out... in many forms... the diaper pail is straight across from me! Needless to say, I'm feeling quite inspired this morning! So, last week we were struggling. I was feeling a little hopeless with this new regimen for our 4 year old, finishing up our homeschool year, our 7 year old beginning the craziness of baseball season, working on my childbirth educator certification... the list could go on. These are all things I feel we are supposed to be doing. I was just feeling stretched! Then Wednesday happened. I can't explain it. Our 4 year old just woke up in a great mood! That NEVER happens! He was sweet, patient, kind; the little boy I hadn't seen in quite a while. It was an amazing day. We had a few little meltdowns, but I was able to talk him through it! I stuck with the normal routine. I didn't push the little things, as usual, like socks or matching clothes. He even ASKED to do school! Again let me remind you... THAT NEVER HAPPENS! I tried not to get my hopes up, but I definitely enjoyed the day. I was expecting an absolutely awful day on Thursday. It couldn't happen again... But it did!!! Then it happened again on FRIDAY! Please understand, these are not perfect days. These are not even "normal kid" kinda days. But I can honestly say that he was on HIS best behavior about 75% of the time. HIS best is all I'm shooting for at this point! Any glimmer of hope is accepted! Weekends are always rough, especially if there's anything out of the ordinary. This last Saturday we had a birthday party... which I have to always prepare myself for the aftermath. He did really great. His usual 15 minutes at a time with the other kids would be followed by another 15 minutes inside by himself. It was a normal party for him. However, what was also normal for us was the exit. I am so glad we were with friends who understand! haha! We left that party with a moaning 4 year old draped across my shoulder. Then we had church the next morning... So I say all of this as a precursor for this morning. Today, no one woke up in a good mood, in particular a little 4 year old I know. 30 minutes ago, I'm in the bathroom with kids screaming outside the door: "I want juice!" "I want breakfast!" The 1 year old was chanting my name: "Ma-ma! Ma-ma! Ma-ma!" It was like before a football game when the players run onto the field... the fog, the lights, the fans chanting their names... Except I certainly do not get paid like that! Today, I am getting paid in poopy diapers, time outs, math worksheets, a whole lot of dirty laundry, & hopefully a really big coffee. No judgements. It's just where we are! 
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Yesterday was a big day! It was the long-awaited appointment for our son with the alternative doctor. I stayed up late Sunday night typing up his 3-day food diary, a chronological history of his life including (but not limited to) symptoms, and a page with our main concerns & goals. I woke up yesterday morning with a migraine, but brushed it off as best as I could because I couldn’t let anything else distract me. This day was about my sweet boy. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous. We had opinions on a “diagnosis”, but nothing from anyone we actually wanted to work with. This doctor, in our opinion, was the expert on kids behavior disorders & treating them holistically, as opposed to medically. To be going to her and getting what was, in our opinion, the real diagnosis… definitely scary, but exciting. We sat in her office, talking about his life. When she asked about vaccinations, and I told her about the reactions he had at 2,4,6 months& again at 15 months (the usual DTap, MMR, Chicken Pox) she said… “Wow! You guys are so lucky he isn’t completely autistic!” *Especially considering the antibiotic he was put on at that same 15 month appointment for an ear infection. Talk about a compromised immune system! At one point I was starting to feel really guilty, and I just felt my son lean his head on my shoulder, as if to say, “It’s ok mommy”. Then she started on what we’ve been doing to deal with the struggles. We took away Gluten, most sugars, all dyes; we give him lavender or an Essential Oils blend called “Peaceful Child” at least 2 or 3 times a day; we give him chamomile drops in his water twice a day. That’s when I started to feel ok. She was so relieved that we weren’t started from ground zero with him. She commended us for going with our gut when we suspected Gluten intolerance. She was impressed with our use of oils & herbs. She was extremely pleased with the reduced sugars and dyes, telling us this is usually shocking news to most parents. PHEW! What a relief! Sometimes you just need a good pat on the back! Sometimes, as a mom, you need to hear someone other than your husband tell you you’re making the right choices. I knew we had been doing good things, but it often felt like just a whirlwind of options that all could be right for our son. When you’re in the middle of a storm and the rain is blowing sideways, it’s hard to tell if you’re umbrella’s working or not… IT’S ALL SO WET! So, basically we found out that our umbrellas were working! What is going on? Well we were right that our son does have Autism Spectrum Disorder. He also has ADHD. I was a little shocked by this, because he is not outwardly hyperactive. He has trouble sitting still and is very boisterous, but I know ADHD kids & it didn’t look like my son. The way she explained it was genius. His ADHD all takes place inside. He is never at rest. So much that all his body’s systems are moving at such a fast-paced rate that they aren’t processing things properly. His digestive system is a wreck, because his body is essentially heating up everything as it passes through due to such rapid activity. We are treating him with herbs, supplements, digestive enzymes & probiotics… right down my alley! I cannot wait to see what God has in store for this little guy. He is overflowing with potential, and we are just using natural remedies to help his body begin to heal it self. Our goal is to help him succeed in life, with as few struggles as possible… For now that means I have 4 boxes on my counter dividing his drops & supplements by morning, evening, bedtime, mealtimes. A little overwhelming, but I am really looking forward to the journey we are starting right now!  Today is my first blog back after the Easter & Passover holidays. I decided I needed a break for a couple weeks. I needed time to re-group. We have been on this roller-coaster in the past year with our middle son. He is 4 1/2, and has lots of behavioral and social delays on the Autism Spectrum. We are in the very beginning of this process with him. It took me a good 6 months to even use the term "Autism Spectrum Disorder". I felt like if I acknowledged what we were dealing with that I was "labeling" him. I had been carrying around this burden for months, years even; since he first started behaving differently than other kids his age. I felt responsible, almost guilty, for what was happening to my son! There were several moments that I felt had contributed. As parents, it's hard to see your child struggle, and to think that a decision you made could have started it all is often too much. It was for me! The reality though, was that I needed to give it a name. Giving it a name would allow me to start helping him recover. I truly believe that he will recover. I have already seen changes since we began certain routines. We have kept him on a strictly Gluten-free diet, and noticed a significant difference within about 3 days, then again at 2 weeks. He's still at that same place now, but any little change is a big one when you're walking through this with your child. We have just begun to dive into all the Essential Oils options (which are SO COOL!), and have an appointment with a natural, alternative doctor next week. I am still hopeful. I look forward to the day that he can walk into a room full of other children and not have an anxiety attack. I can't wait to see him have meaningful relationships someday. Sheesh- I look forward to the first day there's not a screaming meltdown over someone talking to him while he's playing! He will do those things. He will do more! Today as I am writing this, it is Autism Awareness Day. Last year this day meant nothing. Today, however, I am completely aware. This disorder has become a part of my daily life. The motto for the Autism Awareness Month is "Light It Up Blue". People everywhere are wearing blue, putting blue lightbulbs in, and spreading the word that these children are just as "bright" as every other child... just a different light. It holds a special place in my heart, because my special boy's FAVORITE color, to the point of obsession, is BLUE! How perfect is that?! How perfect is he!  |
Kourtney OwensI am a mommy of SEVEN (yes 7) beautiful kids! They are amazing, wonderful, hilarious & the greatest babies I could ask for! I am married to my best friend & high school sweetheart, Michael. Categories
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July 2022
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I love to craft. I love to decorate. I am passionate about natural living & natural birthing. Sometimes I write stuff. I plan parties like my life depended on it. My favorite color is pink. My house is definitely NOT taupe. I typically cannot keep plants alive. I am only allowed to have dogs as pets because all others tend to have the same end result as the plants. Luckily my track record with kids is pretty good! Also, I drink a lot of coffee. And I really like tacos. |
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